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Therefore, women (NRO’s concern) and low-status men (Heartiste’s concern) will lose out.

I got so tired of trying to explain that this doesn’t match reality that I started digging back in old survey data to see if I could just disprove it.

It asks: What happens to women in a world where we scrap the “binary axis” of monogamy? Nobody is asking for a show called “Brother Husbands.” Nine of ten pictures for polyamory involve one man with multiple women.

Polygamy uniquely subjugates one sex; it’s like an institutionalized form of the hookup culture — with women on call for male pleasure, just with some boundaries and a relationship status.

Men – especially high-status men – are going to date lots of women.

But women aren’t going to date lots of men, so all the women will end up dating the same few high-status men and ignore the low-status men.

I interpret NRO and Heartiste’s theories to predict that more poly men than mono men would be single, that the median poly woman would have more partners than the median poly man, but that there would be more poly men with very high numbers of partners than poly women with the same. For poly men, 29% were single, 47% had one partner, 17% had two partners, 4% had three, 2% had four, and only 0.5% had five or more.

For poly women, 8% were single, 44% had one partner, 23% had two partners, 15% had three partners, 8% had four, and 4% had five or more. But the average number of partners was higher for women, and there were more women with very high numbers of partners than men with the same.

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